Technology for country folk

[click image to enlarge]

from email; no source given

Against adversity

If one dream 

should fall and break

into a thousand pieces...

...never be afraid

to pick one of those pieces up

and begin again.

That's the beauty of being alive ---

We can always start all over again.

LIFE is like a book --

everyday has a new page 

with adventures to tell

lessons to learn

and tales of good deeds to remember.

Hope you had a good episode today.

Being a real man

Some guys feel the need to love a thousand different women but

a REAL MAN knows how to love ONE woman...

...a thousand different ways.

replies to saying i love u

From a text....

warning, this is only for fun....

pag sinabihan kita ng iLoveyou,

ano reply mo?!

a. i Love you too...

b. i Love you more...

C. tLga?! Thank you!!!

d. wow... gumagnon na!!!

e. sory...im taken...

f. so tayo na?!

g. huh?! kaw tlaga!!!

h. bkit ngayn mo lang cnabi!!! syang taken na Q

i. can u keep that until maging single ako?

j. loko-loko!!!

k. baliw!!!

l. Love you too fwend...

m.e gaga ka pla e...

n. wrong send ka...

Try mo matatawa ka sa mga rply nla.

life imperfect

Life never 

seems to be

the way we want it.

But we need

to live it the

best way 

we can.

There's no PERFECT LIFE...

But we can

fill it with

PERFECT

MOMENTS.

ingenious advertising

[from an email, no source given]

thankful for friendship

Having 

some1

Like you

in my Life

gives me

so many

reasons

to smile

to be 

thankful,

to be proud,

and say...

see? i got the loveliest friend in the world!

side effects

Mr. Bean felt ill and went to the hospital.

The doctor checked him and suggested to have a couple of days of treatment.

Treatment started and the attendant gave him a tablet.

He started cutting the sides of the tablet.

Attendant: Why are you cutting the sides of the tablet?

Mr. Bean:  To avoid side effects

Do you know why God blessed you another morning to wake up?

Its ti forget the pains of yesterday,

and see the chance the new day has brought...

to dance and laugh again...

to make up for the wrong things you've done...

to see your friends...

to love again...

and to make others feel happy and loved.

See?

It's more than just another long day ahead.

It's God's way of reminding you that He cares and loves you...

Caring

Even though

i know

you can handle

your life

on your own

that doesnt

keep me

from being concerned 

and wanting 2b ther 4 U....

so no matter wht,

hold on to this thought:

"I care"

maski di

obvious!

In the name of the...

[from an email, no source indicated]

This is a story of one poor customer service officer who receives calls on a daily basis.
One day he has to endure the conversation as follows:

Customer: 'May I know yourname?..'
CSO: 'Batman...'
Customer: 'May I know yourname?'
CSO: 'My name is Bat-man...'
Customer: 'Trying to be funny?!.What is your surname?..'
CSO: 'Supar-man.. .'
Customer: (shouting) 'I want tospeak with your manager...'

Taking a break

Practice the pause.

When in doubt,

Practice the pause.

When angry,

Practice the pause.

When tired,

Practice the pause.

When stressed,

Practice the pause.

Breathe...

Clear the mind...

View from a different perspective...

Smile...

Laugh...

Sleep...

Dream...

Breathe...

Even your heart needs rest.

Post ZTE

Gloria: hoy sec Neri, totoo b n tnwag mo akong evil?

Neri: a,e... yon po kc ang acronym ng pgkatao nyo ma'am...

        Expert, Versatile, Intelligent n Lovely!

Gloria: hi,hi,hi... true ka dyan! Evil nga ako!

8 text prayers

1.

The GOD we meet in

GOOD TIMES,

is the same we meet in

HARD TIMES.

May the Lord

REFRESH us 

& give us STRENGTH

as we face

new challenges

2.

Since

my hands

cant

reach you,

Let 

my 

prayers

hug you

with....

GOD's 

love and blessings,

guidance and good health

not only today but always.

3.

Before you sleep,

just gently lay every troubled thought away;

drop your burden

 and your care in the quiet arms of prayer

because

GOD never sleeps.

4.

Even though I clutch my blanket and growl when the alarm rings,

Thank You Lord that I can Hear...

There are many who are deaf.

Even though I keep my eyes closed against the morning light as long as possible,

Thank You Lord that I can See...

There are many who are blind.

Even though I huddle in my bed and put off rising,

Thank You Lord that I have Strength to rise...

There are many who are bedridden.

God's Love Be with You.

5.

God's people fail a hundred times before each day is done...

But grace, in whispers, lifts them up one hundred times and one.

--William D. Blake

6.

We

aLwaYs

ask

GOD

2 give 

us

sigNs &

miracLes

2

deepeN

r

faith.

But

would 

it be

Nice

2 be

aware

that 

JESUS

is d

sigN

& YOU

are d

miracLe.

7.

prayer

is the 

best shield

agains all trials.

a heart 2 heart 

talk with GOd

will lessen

ur burden

4 HE will

nvr say no

2 those

who believe

in HIM

8.

i'm

ur

friend

bt

GOD

is ur BESTFRIEND

u

can

cry 

to me

bt

GOD

can DRY

ur TEARS

i

luV

you

but

GOD

luVs U

DEEPER

u

cn

hold

my HAND

bt GOD

can CARRY U

anyTym

Happiness isn't

getting what we want,

But its being satisfied

with what we have.

The way to be happy 

is

to be grateful

even with the

smallest blessings

we receive.

Upon waking up,

What r u

thinking?

Problems?

Money?

Love life?

Work?

Food?

Try to think this,

Thank GOD 

for another life.

And the rest will be fine.

True friendship is letting those around you not only be themselves but be their best.
As iron sharpens iron, a friend sharpens a friend. -- Prov 27:17

Lenten Week texts

My soul sweetly resigned to God's disposal of me, in every regard, and I saw there has nothing happened to me but what was best for me

-- David Brainerd

---------

Jesus is

you....

-------------------------------

|                                            | ull-time

-------------------------------

|                                | riend

-----------------------

|              | orever

|              |

|              |

-----------

Happy Easter

---------

This season of Lent,

keep in mind that

our life and

possessions are 

just lent to us.

We are mer 

passers- by

and take nothing when we die

But we can leave behind the

love we had shared,

the hope we had given,

and the goodness we did.

Have a meaningful

Lenten season.

----------

2 those i hv

WRONGED

i ask 4GIVNESS

2 those i may hv

HELPED

i wish i did MORE

2 those hu

HELPED me,

i sincerely THANK YOU.

Hv a holy LENTEN season

----------

 

Thoughts for the Holy Week

CP laging hawak at
ipinapakita
Bible laging nakatago at
ayaw ipakita

CP binibili kahit libo-libo halaga
Bible ayaw bilhin kahit isang daan halaga

CP laging binabasa kung may msg
Bible hindi binabasa kaya di makita ang msg

CP ayaw magasgasan
Bible ok lang kahit maalikabukan

CP mahirap ipahiram baka masira
Bible madaling ipahiram kahit mawala

CP nauubusan ng msg
Bible laging full of message

CP ay mahalagang gamit
Bible mas mahalaga kung gagamitin.
------------------------------------

The most tiring thing to do?
To Think.

The most expensive?
Smile.

The hardest to regain?
Trust.

The most painful?
Loss.

The easiest escape?
To Pretend.

The most challenging?
To Move on.

The bravest thing to do?
To Love.

The most effective solution?
To Pray.
----------

This
morning
I pray to
God
2
bless
u.

2
guide
u

2
keep
u
safe

2
give
u
peace of mind

2
give
u
joy

and

2
give
u
love. 

God Bless
------

Lord,
walk with me
today.

I've no idea
wat lies ahead.

Be my guide
and strength
in all that I do
for Your glory.

All of life is a test
A very important test
is when you cant fell
God's presence in in your life,

But don't worry, 'coz
at a time you are put to a test,

HE will give you the strength
to endure it
and provide you
with a way out

TO see whats unseen

TO feel without even touching

Is the miracle called...






SCHIZOPHRENIA

hindi love.

The importance of a good friend in our lives
is like the importance of our heartbeat...

Though they are not visible,
They silently support our life.

Little things we give away come back as blessings some other day.

It's God's way of giving rewards to those who share their unselfish hearts.

Post valentine

Texts/sms received at the height of valentine's day:

1.
Life is short dB?
Bka my
gz2 ka sbhn
skin dgDgan mu nlng 2....

a. Wg m q iwn kc --

b. Sory qng --

c. Slmat sau dhl --

d. D q xpct n --

e. Sna --

f. Lam m --

plz answer '',)


2.
Ngayong Araw ng
mga Puso, Binabati ko ang mga
NAGMAMAHALAN --
bigas, asukal, gasolina, pan de sal, kuryente, tubig, tuition fee, karne, isda, gulay!
Hapi Harts Day!

3.
Spread
Love
everywhere
you go...
Let
no
one
ever come
to
you
and leave without
feeling
better
or happier...
Be
the
expression
of
God's
kindness.
Hapi hearts day!

4.
A Beautiful world
can only
be seen
thru d
eyes of a
Happy Heart...

may u always
have a
happy heart
2 see
d beauty that
God made
specially 4 u.

5.
May your stress
be less
May your blessings
be more
and nothing but
happiness come
flooding through
your heart.

click comic to enlarge
Cathy

Filipino Excuse Letters

[from an email, no source indicated]

These are excuse notes from parents (including original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country.

My son is under a doctors care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him. (Hala! Sige. Silya elektrika at bitay. Sabay pa! O kaya niyo yun?)

Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot. (Pag nag-absent pala papatayin ka...Baka may rabies...)

Dear School : Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31,32, and also 33 . ( Aba grabe to. Nasa kalendaryo pa ang birthday ko kung ganon. Hahaha!)

Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.(Ano daw???? )

Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.(Hanapin natin!)

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
(Bwehehehe.. -. la ako masabi... Bwahahaha! Ganito kasi yan. Kinagat siya ni Lola sa noo sa gigil. Tapos nabali yung ngipin ng pustiso niya.Hahaha!!!)

Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins. (Buti pa veins niya. Close sila. Hahahaha!!!)

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels. (Aah.....eh. -...i.... .-ow....u. .-..)

Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust. (So transsexual pala si Irving ?)

Sally wont be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral. ( Ala e! Mabuhay ang Patay!! Mayroong Himala!!!)

Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well. (Stud service ba yung school nya? baka gremlins siya.)

Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover. (Ay grabe! Iba na talaga ang mga kabataan ngayon. Hahaha!)

Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat,headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat,her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasnt the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night. (Hahaha, telenovela.. -. bow. Makuwento siya ha... Kulang lang sa pansin...)

Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
(Winner to!!!!!!!!!! Ang galing!!!! Puwede rin kaya sa office ito?)

eternal flame for the busy and serious person

The truth behind the song
ETERNAL FLAME
and who really sang it....

BULAG: close your eyes,

PILAY: give me your hand darling

BINGI: do you hear my heart beating?

BOBO: do you understand?

MANHID: do you feel the same?

DUKHA: am I only dreaming?

BUMBERO: is this buring? an eternal flame!

PIPI: say my name,

BALIW: sunshine through the rain,

KAWAWA: my whole life, so lonely....

ILUSYUNADA: then you've come and ease the pain

MARTYR: I don't wana lose this feeling....

SALINGPUSA: ohhhh...

No Brainer

10 biggest brain damaging habits:

1. no breakfast
2. overeating
3. smoking
4. high sugar consumption
5. air pollution
6. sleep deprivation
7. head covered while sleeping
8. working the brain during illness
9. lacking in stimulating thoughts
10. talking rarely

Should have been No. 1

[from an email, no source indicated]

click comic to enlarge

Doubt

When you are deeply troubled
by fear
and inward doubt,

Strive to do what pleases God
and He will lead you out.

Keep you eyes on God and
you'll soon lose sight
of your fears.

STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Letters.... S.T.R.

[from an email, no source indicated]

as forwarded...

STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Letters.... S.T.R.

My nurse friend sent this and encouraged me to post it and spread the word. I agree.

 

If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks. Seriously..

 

Please read:

 

STROKE IDENTIFICATION:

During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine (they offered to call paramedics) .....she said she had just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes.

 

They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food. While she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening.

 

Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00 pm Ingrid passed away.) She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today. Some don't die.... they end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead.

 

It only takes a minute to read this...

A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke... totally . He said the trick was getti ng a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough.

 

RECOGNIZING A STROKE

Thank God for the sense to remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!

 

Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster. The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke

Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions:

S * Ask the individual to SMILE.

T * Ask the person to TALK and SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently)

( i.e. It is sunny out today)

R * Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS.

If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call 999/911 immediately and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.

 

New Sign of a Stroke -------- Stick out Your Tongue

 

NOTE: Ask the person to 'stick' out his tongue.. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other , that is also an indication of a stroke.

 

A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.

Lonesome and loveless

Blue roses
are for lovers,

White chocolates
are for crushes,

Pink balloons
are for friendships...

Most of all

for loveless people

Red...








REDHORSE!


with photo credit

Gardening and life

[from an email, source unknown]

the cactus
my teacher

I was never fascinated with cactuses, those prickly plants that grow in the desert, until I saw them peddled in every nook and corner of the city.

Initially I bought just a pot to replace the one I had in my room which mysteriously died inside an expensive open round glass half-filled with black and white sand and pebbles. After a few weeks it also died. Determined to unravel the mystery of dying cactus I bought another three pots. After two months I am pleasantly surprised they remain alive!

My cactuses taught me valuable lessons about plant care. One, they taught me not all plants need careful and constant tending.

Some, like the cactuses, are better left alone. One time, I was meticulously removing the debris suspended in my cactus’ prickles when my friend Bong commented such excessive trimming was ridiculous since cactus thrives in the desert without any human care at all!

At first I refused to believe my cactuses do not need to be fussed over, insisted on my on idea of plant life, and constantly watered my cactuses. When my first cactus died I knew it was because of "water deluge." Since then I restrained myself from doting over my other cactuses and half pretended they didn’t exist. The one in my office has grown high looking pulpy!

One of the cactuses I bought had two stems like horns. When I saw it at a corner store it looked ugly without its pot. I bought it at the end thinking the two "horns" symbolized " life in ugliness". One day I discovered to my dismay its dry soil became a habitat for a horde of scampering ants and one of the " horns" was bitten. The poor "horn" then stopped growing and eventually fell off. The other "horn" continued to grow vertically and now measures half a foot. I’ve been waiting for it to grow thick but until now it remains a thin elongated stem awkwardly hoisted!

My cactuses aptly illustrate people’s need to be left alone, to be given enough space, in order to grow. Excessive attention can stunt or stifle growth. I think now of the times when I feel strongly the need to disengage from familiar surroundings and be lost in unfamiliar world. I believe some of my nurturing moments happened in aloneness, when I was compelled to discover my own inner resource and strength. I also think now of the silence of God when I felt deserted and abandoned. With the benefit of hindsight I now see those times as God ordained, when God, like a father teaching his child to walk, purposely inhibited himself from picking me up in order for my little faith to bedrock.

I also now think of the people I minister to. Compelled by the sense of call to minister I identify myself with their issues strongly such that I also feel weighed down. A recent conversation with a counselor/ therapist raised the need to maintain boundaries.

I also think now of my tendency to be set in my ways and thin king. When my cactus refused to grow as I expected, the poor thing seemed to taunt me of my inability to control it. Some things happen differently from expectations and so I need to think out of the box. There were many times I thought I anticipated God, only to find out later that He is more than I could ever imagine. Such times were mostly hard and difficult, tempting me to accuse God of negligence, of misleading me, of playing with my emotions, of taking my feelings for granted, of abandoning me.

My cactuses also taught me to accept evidence of life even in unpleasant or ugly places. This is an important reminder for me because it teaches me to have unrelenting hope for hard and difficult people, realities and circumstances. I confess my unwillingness at times to learn to love people whose behavior I find obnoxious or below my standard, assuming that not harboring malice or hostility against them is enough for the conscience. I also tend to avoid difficult people to protect myself from emotional strain, forgetting that I can also be hard to relate with (and so in danger of being dropped out of some people’s social registry!).

I also try to shun difficult situations, forgetting that the Spirit of God at the beginning was present and hovering over chaos and emptiness.

My years with the movement have been a motley set of ambivalence, reversals, contrasts, perplexities, ambiguities, and enigmas. They are a palette of contrasting, combining, and complementing hues. There is no one motif. At times I feel consumed by a great passion for the Kingdom of God. At other times I feel overtaken by a lingering sense of meaningless, purposelessness, and brokenness.

What I can say then that my Christian conversion is a continuing experience of the tension between the Spirit and the flesh, that is a daily appropriation of the power to prevail in Christ.

These thought are with me now as I wrap up work with the movement and prepare for a new life as a court employee. I want to thank you for all your prayers an practical support these past six years. Your partnership created within me the necessary sense of accountability and responsibility. I feel privileged to have you as partners and friends. May I request that you consider supporting the movement in its various programs. Like you I strongly believe in its strategic ministry of reaching out to students on campus and graduates in the marketplace.

The Lord is good. May He supply all your needs and let His love overflow in you and through you. I would like to pray for you too. Please let me hear from you.

Holiday Greetings Redux

The holidays is ended and people are now going back to the reality that is life.
Below are the holiday greetings received during the holidays, a form of reminiscing before work drowns me...


Not all giftsare under theChristmas tree.
Most of themare found in theheart.
Merry Christmas.



may this,
candle of
Christmas
bring you and your family
the light of peace,
love,
happiness
and prosperity.
Merry Christmas.


My 12 christmas wishes for you:
1. happiness deep inside.
2. serenity at every sunrise.
3. success in every facet of your life.
4. family beside you.
5. caring friends around you.
6. a love that never ends.
7. good health within you.
8. beautiful memories of yesterdays.
9. a nice day with so much to be thankful for.
10.a pathway leading to better tomorrows.
11.dreams that manage to come true; and
12.a great appreciation for whatever you do.
Merry Christmas.


I remember God's love for me in people like you...
so on wings of prayers,
I whisper my thanks to him and
ask Him to bless youin countless ways...
Merry Christmas.


An kamurayaw nga dara han pasko
makab-utan unta nimo han imo mga hinigugma.
Malaum-laum na pasko


I pray that happiness be at your door.
May it knock early,
and leave the gift of God's peace,
love, joy and
good health behind...
Merry Christmas!


It's Christmas all over the world!
May we fell and understandthe full meaning of Christ's birth.
A blessed Christmasto you and your family
God's bless


May you be Blessed beyond what you expect.
Merry christmass to you and your family
Let the loveof God Lighten your life;
Let His kindness
Mold you into His presence
Let Him be your guide
As you travel the road of life.
God Bless Merry Christmas.


May the season's spirit
inspire us in our efforts of building
a just and prosperous
society for our people.
Merry Christmas.


God's gift to me are people like you...
So on wings of prayers,
I whispered my thanksto Him and ask Him
to bless you in countless ways!
Merry Christmas.


Silver and Gold I have none.
but here's our wish for you the IRISH Blessing:
May there always be work for your hands to do.
May your purse always holda coin or two.
May the sun always shine on your window pane.
May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain.
May the hand of a friend always be near you.
And may God fill your hear with gladness to cheer you always.
And may you have a most Merry Christmass and a Blessed New Year.

Happy New Year